Edgar's
Story of The Bicycle
Story of The Bicycle
Edgar began, "When I was young our family was very poor. I had always
wanted a bicycle but my father could never afford one for me. One
morning he got up and looked out the window. There, leaning against the
house was a bicycle. My father said, "Edgar, where did you get that
bicycle?" I said, and these are Edgar's words, "It's like this father. Last
night as I was walking home, a girl came along riding the bicycle. She
said,'Hop on! We'll go for a ride.' So we rode for awhile, then she steered
us into the park. We sat down on the grass for awhile. Then we lay down
on the grass. Then, she took off her panties, and said, 'Edgar, you can
have anything you want.' The pants didn't fit, so I took the bike."
For a minute you could have heard a pin drop in that auditorium. Then the
laughter started, and rolled until the rafters shook
Those poor ladies must have been scandalized. As far as I know, none of
us even bothered to thank them for their kindness. We were probably
preoccupied with plans to seduce their daughters at the first opportunity.
wanted a bicycle but my father could never afford one for me. One
morning he got up and looked out the window. There, leaning against the
house was a bicycle. My father said, "Edgar, where did you get that
bicycle?" I said, and these are Edgar's words, "It's like this father. Last
night as I was walking home, a girl came along riding the bicycle. She
said,'Hop on! We'll go for a ride.' So we rode for awhile, then she steered
us into the park. We sat down on the grass for awhile. Then we lay down
on the grass. Then, she took off her panties, and said, 'Edgar, you can
have anything you want.' The pants didn't fit, so I took the bike."
For a minute you could have heard a pin drop in that auditorium. Then the
laughter started, and rolled until the rafters shook
Those poor ladies must have been scandalized. As far as I know, none of
us even bothered to thank them for their kindness. We were probably
preoccupied with plans to seduce their daughters at the first opportunity.
In St. John's there was an establishment that rented pedal bicycles. For a
few dollars you could get a bike for a day, and another chap and I used to
rent them to visit a couple of girls at Donovan's Siding, near Topsails. But
this tale is about a Saturday just after payday when three of us, Crandal,
Barney, and I decided to get some liquid refreshments, rent some bikes,
and pedal out to Bowring Park.
We went to the liquor store on Water Street and bought some Sloe Gin,
because in our unsophisticated taste for booze we thought it would work
slowly, some Teacher's Highland Cream, because we thought is would be
rich and creamy, and a bottle of the good stuff, Canadian Rye Whiskey.
Then we set off for Bowring Park.
After a couple of snorts out of each of the bottles the inevitable happened.
Soon we were riding up and down the walking paths, strictly against the
rules, of course, bumping into each other, and enjoying ourselves
immensely. We were soon ushered out of the park and we headed for
home.
One of the bikes developed a faulty wheel, a condition that was not
improved by getting a few kicks from an army boot. We returned the
bikes to a very unhappy bicycle shop owner. I don't remember, but I
hope we paid for the damages.
Crandall, mentioned in this tale, was killed in action.
few dollars you could get a bike for a day, and another chap and I used to
rent them to visit a couple of girls at Donovan's Siding, near Topsails. But
this tale is about a Saturday just after payday when three of us, Crandal,
Barney, and I decided to get some liquid refreshments, rent some bikes,
and pedal out to Bowring Park.
We went to the liquor store on Water Street and bought some Sloe Gin,
because in our unsophisticated taste for booze we thought it would work
slowly, some Teacher's Highland Cream, because we thought is would be
rich and creamy, and a bottle of the good stuff, Canadian Rye Whiskey.
Then we set off for Bowring Park.
After a couple of snorts out of each of the bottles the inevitable happened.
Soon we were riding up and down the walking paths, strictly against the
rules, of course, bumping into each other, and enjoying ourselves
immensely. We were soon ushered out of the park and we headed for
home.
One of the bikes developed a faulty wheel, a condition that was not
improved by getting a few kicks from an army boot. We returned the
bikes to a very unhappy bicycle shop owner. I don't remember, but I
hope we paid for the damages.
Crandall, mentioned in this tale, was killed in action.
I Become "D" Coy, Company Clerk
One day I was summoned to "D" Company's office and was offered the
job of Company Clerk. The clerk who preceded me was a pleasant chap,
somewhat older than the rest of us and probably because of the age
difference did not associate with us. He was also a drinker and I think that
is why he was replaced. We never saw him again.
job of Company Clerk. The clerk who preceded me was a pleasant chap,
somewhat older than the rest of us and probably because of the age
difference did not associate with us. He was also a drinker and I think that
is why he was replaced. We never saw him again.
Having a grade 10 education I was probably one of the better qualified
academically to fill the vacancy. The job would be interesting, not too
arduous and best of all would keep me off the parade square. Although I
would still have to go to training exercises I was exempt from the daily
grind of small arms training and other maneuvers. Of course I accepted.
academically to fill the vacancy. The job would be interesting, not too
arduous and best of all would keep me off the parade square. Although I
would still have to go to training exercises I was exempt from the daily
grind of small arms training and other maneuvers. Of course I accepted.
As Company Clerk my job was to keep an account of the details of the
happenings in the Company, such things as , "Sick Report", "Absentee
Report" and a "Parade Report", "Detention Report", etc., and to turn in a
daily report to Major Parker. It was not easy to juggle the figures and I
was often tempted to cook the figures, a little, to make them jibe. But, I
didn't though it was quite an accounting procedure for a 19-year old.
happenings in the Company, such things as , "Sick Report", "Absentee
Report" and a "Parade Report", "Detention Report", etc., and to turn in a
daily report to Major Parker. It was not easy to juggle the figures and I
was often tempted to cook the figures, a little, to make them jibe. But, I
didn't though it was quite an accounting procedure for a 19-year old.